I was just thinking about this time last year ... Jessica and I were still together. December 25, 2000, was our three month anniversary and we were so loving ... And we exchanged Christmas gifts and held hands and talked and made love and loved each other unconditionally and nothing could have changed that except for my stupidity. I'm sorry ... I wish I could move on, but I can't. I don't know if it's Jessica that keeps me at that point or if it's the feeling she gave me. To those of you who know what I'm talking about, I don't need to explain, and to the rest, you'll find out soon. Just don't let go of what you love as easily as I did ... And there isn't one thing I wouldn't give to have back what we had, Jessica ... I'm sorry.